I see you and again, I am wanting you, loving you, escaping with you into the once empty space in my mind that has now been consumed with you. Into the place I now call My Secret Hell.

And Hell it is to be possessed with such a longing that evades every unoccupied thought as to try and cause me to try and fill them with things of insignificance, or maybe even something of enough importance to let me dwell there long enough to get a relief.

And Hell it is, not to be able to explain. Friends say I'm zombie like, with an empty stare. They don't know its because I see things they don't see and hear things they don't hear. Why, they would just laugh at me if I told them how I saw you smiling at me from that big billboard on the highway last night. And how just this morning you were singing a love song to me on the radio, the D.J. said so.

And Hell it is, when with an over run imagination, I feel the fires of jealousy burn me, and angry thoughts of revenge envelope me. But then you are kissing me, and the fire in my mind is cooled in comparison with the fire in your lips.

And Hell it is, not to welcome sleep, for sleep will only bring more vivid images of what should be a reality, only to awaken and relive them again and again.

And Hell it is, to be so close yet so far from you, waiting for those few short moments when I get to be close to you. Close enough to rekindle the never ending Secret Hell in my mind.

An Angel Original
© Copyright 2003 Paula Scola
All Rights Reserved

Always Wanting You-midi