There are only two kinds of people in the world,
The Irish, and those who wish they were.
If you're enough lucky to be Irish...
You're lucky enough!

Grant me a sense of humor, Lord,
The saving grace to see a joke,
To win some happiness from life,
And pass it on to other folk.

Irish Toasts,Blessings,And Proverbs

There are many good reasons for drinking,
One has just entered my head.
If a man doesn't drink when he's living,
How in the hell can he drink when he's dead?

An Irishman is never drunk as long as he can hold onto one blade of grass to keep him from falling off the earth.

Some may say the glass is half empty,
Some may say the glass is half full,
But the Irish will forever say
"Are you gonna drink that?"

An Old Irish recipe for Longevity:
Leave the table hungry.
Leave the bed sleepy.
Leave the table thirsty.

May those who love us, love us
And those who don't love us,
May God turn their hearts
And if he can't turn their hearts,
May he turn their ankles
So we will know them by their limping!

May you have:
No frost on your spuds,
No worms on your cabbage.
May your goat give plenty of milk.
And if you inherit a donkey,
May she be in foal.
Here's to you as good as you are
Here's to me as bad as I am
But as good as you are
And as bad as I am
I'm just as good as you are
As bad as I am!

Here's to a long life and a merry one
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold beer and another one!

Here's to the old lady up the hill.
If she won't drink it, I will!

Drink is the curse of the land.
It makes you fight with your neighbor.
It makes you shoot at your neighbor.
It makes you miss.

Here's to a sweetheart, a bottle, and a friend.
The first beautiful, the second full, the last ever faithful.

When Irish eyes are smiling,
watch your step!

When we drink, we get drunk.
When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
So, let's all get drunk, and go to heaven!

Here's to lying, stealing, and cheating!
May you lie to save a friend;
May you steal the heart of the one you love;
and may you cheat death.

Here’s to beefsteak when you’re hungry,
Whiskey when you’re dry,
All the women you’ll ever want,
And heaven when you die.

Here’s a toast to your enemies’ enemies!

Here's to Eileen O'Hara,
For her life it held no terror.
Born a virgin.
Died a virgin.
No runs, no hits, no errors.

Here’s to you and yours
And to mine and ours.
And if mine and ours
Ever come across to you and yours,
I hope you and yours will do
As much for mine and ours
As mine and ours have done
For you and yours!

May your glass be ever full.
May the roof over your head be always strong.
And may you be in heaven
half an hour before the devil knows you're dead.

Here's to the four hinges of society.
May you fight, steal, lie and drink.
When you fight, may you fight for your country.
When you steal, may you steal away from bad company.
When you lie, may you lie at the side of your sweetheart.
And when you drink, may you drink with me.

As you slide down the banister of life,
May the splinters never point in the wrong direction!

May your home always be too small to hold all your friends.

God is good, but never dance in a small boat.

May your troubles be as few and far between
As my grandmother's teeth.

"Here's to the men of all classes
Who through lasses and glasses
Will make themselves asses."

May your doctor never earn a dollar out of you,
May your heart never give out,
May the ten toes of your feet steer you clear of misfortune.
And before you're much older,
May you hear much better blessings than this.

Here's to us!
Who's like us?
Darned few, and they're all dead!

Drinking is the only way to find out whether or not your neck leaks!

"May you die in bed at ninety-five years, shot by a jealous husband(or wife)."

In Heaven there is no beer, that is why we drink it here.

Here’s to health and prosperity,
To you and all your posterity.
And them that doesn’t drink with sincerity,
That they may be damned for all eternity!

May the Lord keep you in His hand
And never close His fist too tight.
Here's to a temperance supper,
With water in glasses tall,
And coffee and tea to end with--
And me not there at all!

May you always have a clean shirt, a clear conscience, and enough coins in your pocket to buy a pint!

'Twas an evening in November,
As I very well remember.
I was strolling down the street in drunken pride,
But my knees were all aflutter,
So I landed in the gutter,
And a pig came up a lay down by my side.
Yes, I lay there in the gutter
Thinking thoughts I could not utter,
When a colleen passing by did softly say,
"You can tell a man that boozes
By the company he chooses."
At that the pig got up and walked away!
"The Irish Pig"

Here's to being single...
Drinking doubles...
And seeing triple!

That the tap may be open when it rusts!

May your feet never sweat,
your neighbor give you ne're a treat.
When flowers bloom, I hope you'll not sneeze,
and may you always have someone to squeeze!

May you live to be a hundred years,
With one extra year to repent!

May the luck of the Irish
Leap to happiest heights
And the highway you travel
Be lined with green lights.

'Tis glad I am and glad I'll be
That you like knowin' the likes of me!